Well, I managed to survive 18 months of being a mommy to our sweet little girl. Overall, I have yet to decide whether or not being a mommy has come naturally to me. Maybe someone else can answer that. What I can say, is that I think I am a little more of a relaxed parent than what some of my friends thought I would be. Yes, I am one to freak out over small things, but I am willing to let our daughter explore and kind of learn on her own. As she's climbing on things and experiencing life, I have my phone out and taking a picture or video and hoping that this is not the time she goes crashing down and a trip to the ER is made.
I remember the night before I was being induced. The control freak in me was happy and somewhat calm knowing that soon we would be holding our little girl in our arms. At times, the thought of a tiny, little baby in my arms scared me. The self-doubt of can I really help raise and care for another human being would just take over and then knowing that my husband would be right there with me, helped ease those worries.
Overall, our daughter has been good baby. Yes, she has her moments when she is unhappy and yes, it took us some time to learn her cues and be able to understand what she was needing. I have been very blessed to have the opportunity to stay at home with our daughter since mid to late April of last year. During these months I have learned and am still learning what kind of mother she is needing me to be. She has also helped me realize even more that I need to do a better job at not losing my patience. As our daughter has morphed into what some call a toddler, my need for patience has increased. Once I came to the understanding that for the most part, her 'toddler tantrums' were a result of her being frustrated, my goal is to remain calm in hopes that it helps her to calm down and ensures her that I am there for her.
During these first 18 months, Dan has been out of town very little with his job and I am extremely grateful for that. I am not sure how single parents do it. It has been a fun and challenging 18 months and I look forward to continuing to grow as a mother, as our daughter continues to grow into a little girl.